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Hi Pam and Fiona i've had another good look at this. I've been able to incorporate some of your suggestions, but the big one about changing the voice would be difficult. It is a monologue so all that

Hi Stuart I enjoyed reading this, unusual and clever and I liked the form. Though I agree with Fiona, it works best when it’s in the less static conversational style. I don’t think there’s many

Hi Fiona thanks for looking at this. I know what you mean about introducing more flow between the characters. Someone else mentioned this some time ago as well. I did examine this point,but found that

Hi Stuart, This is kind of great and kind of very ugh at the same time! I hate to think where your head was at when you were writing it - haha! You've set yourself a real challenge, writing it as a

Can I start the ball rolling again with a piece of prose for your comments? thanks Stuart A Web Chat Wow! Those strands catch the light, giving each a rainbow. How beautiful! I buzz in here every day

Hi john thanks Stuart https://stuartlarner.blogspot.com/p/stuff-you-can-access-now.html @StuartLarner

The email address is: [email protected] So you SHOULD get this email twice - once through the Group email address, and once individually Happy Sundays!! John

There's a virtual online Literary Festival on at the moment. I've tuned in to a couple. They've been very good. I've seen a couple of you there. here's the link:

This is basically Ok. thanks to Pam and Fiona. This is all Ok, but there could be a bit of flexibility in this for the future, depending on how we go.

Hello, This email message is a notification to let you know that the following files have been uploaded to the Files area of the [email protected] group. * /Ground rules_e-critique

*Hi Pam * thanks for your comments. You're right I took a gamble on a topical subject which is so angst-laden. But I thought if you've got to do something, then go for it. Fortunately, i got a bit of

Thanks for this Stuart. I think it's brave to tackle the current situation as it could go wrong in so many ways, eg come across clumsily or glibly, but you really pulled it off. I had to read it a few

Hi Fiona thank you very much.You are very kind. it is most heartening to? feel that the poem has connected. Stuart

Oh my goodness this is stunning. It's a fantastic picture of the bafflement and discomfort we are feeling, thrust into this bizarre situation. I love the image of round, fat things meandering through

Hi all your opinion on my latest? poem please.. *Two Meeters* After the Prime Minister’s broadcast I became very fat. I measured a metre more all round. Going out, I wore A giant ball of nothing.

Hi Pam, Thanks so much for your comments...I often think I get a bit pompous with my words, but somehow I thought they fitted in this. Or maybe I'm just trying to avoid having to find alternatives as

Hi Fiona Like the other Pam, I'm not a poet. I really liked the conjuring up of mood (a sort of sweet melancholy) and found the rhythm and repetition of the vilanelle form very elegant and quite

As a very occasional poet and more at home with doggerel than villanelles, I won't comment on this one, but I'm very much looking forward to the continuation of YW during this awful time. Best wishes

Thanks Fiona.? I enjoyed doing it.? Any else got anything?Stuart?Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Thanks Stuart! You've made some really useful comments...I'm not much of a poet really and your comments have taught me loads about what I'm trying to do! Thank you so much for taking the time to do