Ben,
It sounds like your wife was dynamic and knew which paths to take. You
supported her decisions, and quite obviously helped her maintain them to the end.
You are lucky (you may not feel like it now) to have had such a wonderful
and active life together. And to be able to live your chosen life. This is
what true life is about. What a life well spent. She will always be with you,
in your head, your heart, your memories, and in all the other lives she has
touched.
I doubt she would have chosen any further allopathic treatments, from what
you said of her personality. You were there for her and your love must have
meant so much to her, you did everything you could.
As someone who has had cancer, I have thought a lot about death, and I've
come to realise that the real pain is with the people around me and not in
myself. I could cope with what was and is thrown at me. She would not want you
to suffer.
Be strong, and I hope you find peace in the knowledge there was nothing more
you could have done.
Michele
